Women Delaying Marriage

“Married by 23, kids by 25”. Sounds familiar? What was considered a ‘normal’ practice for most of the women is now frowned upon by today’s educated, independent women of the 21st century. Women in their 20s very often receive stereotypical comments on being 25 and single with no plans of getting married. It has now become some kind of a sick cultural joke for most of them. Women delaying marriage have become the ‘untamed creatures’ for the society and always fall under their judgy eyes. On the other hand, women today blissfully ignorant of those unwanted opinions are living how they want to and marrying when they want to.

Why Women Are Delaying Marriage Today

I am pretty sure we all have our own ideas on ‘why’ women are delaying marriage or marrying at a later stage. Considering the shift in patriarchal culture, gender equality and the need for self-sufficiency (financially and emotionally), it was an inevitable scenario.

Realizing The Importance Of Career

More and more women are becoming career oriented and goal oriented in life. Being married is not the only purpose. Emphasizing on deeper achievements like self-identity, self-worth, self-respect and striving for equality has taken the front seat. Only an educated mind can pave way for women to stand equal to the patriarchal society. These beliefs and realizations have led the women of today to focus on themselves before they step into the ‘marriage territory’.

Need To Be Self Sufficient

Financial independence is one of the major reasons why women are delaying marriage. They want to marry later, that is, when they have learnt the ability to pay for themselves. It is very much evident how Indian women always had to depend on the male figures (father/husband/father-in-law) forever. This led to major dependence on them and hence could not leave or survive otherwise. It is also an inborn cultural attitude of parents and society that a woman either belongs to her father or her husband. Financial independence provides women with the ability to stand by themselves.

Recommended Read: Why Men Fall For Older Women?

Uncompromising One’s Own Freedom

“You are a girl/woman. You should know how to compromise”. If you’ve heard this at least 5 times, I hear you. Women today are breaking these stereotypical trends with a snap of their fingers. There is a building ego women are enjoying and will not give it up, especially if they are the only ones asked to do so. An educated and financially independent woman possess a subtle amount of self-respect and don’t want to give up on her freedom and personal choices.

Changing Attitude

“I’d rather be alone than stay in an unhappy marriage”. What exactly is the compulsion of marrying? The younger generation is becoming least bothered about what “other people” think. There is a change in attitudes of not just women but even the parents. Parents are supporting the girl child as much as they would do for a son. They can even rely on daughters as well and not just ‘sons’. Parents with a progressive mind are successfully making their girls independent both financially and emotionally. So the need or the so-called ‘burden’ to marry off daughters are fading away. Women are pretty much handling the ‘burden’ now and doing so quite well.

Awareness Of The Socio-Economic Status Of Women In The Country

Not all women have progressive parents and well enough resources to educate themselves. Women from lower socio-economic societies are the real mirror of the country’s status of females (both married and unmarried). The scenario at their own homes are not very uplifting. There is a lack of awareness of own rights and self-worth. Females in such societies have witnessed crimes against dependent women (domestic violence). Girls are married off as soon as they turn 18 and sometimes before that.┬áThere have been studies that showed that girls at a younger age (before 18 years) are less assertive and resistant of violence and oppression (a study jointly conducted by IIM Indore and Shiv Nadar University).

Self Love – “Love Others But Not At The Cost Of Self”

Women have learned the distinction between healthy and unhealthy relationships whether its friendship or a committed relationship. They have the courage to break out of any relationship that does not yield happiness. There has been put a ‘STOP’ card for the extent to which a woman will go out of her way to make a marriage work. In the times of various dating apps and matrimonial sites, women have the privilege to choose. They will marry only when they find the right person. However long that takes. (I don’t mean it literally. You figured that. Right?)

Losing Faith In Commitments – Mental Obstruction For Permanency

I would say this is a western flow of concepts that has now struck Indian minds. Not just women, even the men are taking longer to ‘tie’ the knot. For most of the young people, marriage has become a dreadful thought of being stuck forever. With so many options of dating, casual flings, live-in relationships, the idea of marriage is mentally blocking their notions. Although the faith can be restored if only marriages can work like a two-way road. Both men and women have to understand to support and compliment each other.

The idea of Marriage is Practically Un-affordable

The unspoken notion that parents have to spend their entire fortune that was all saved up for a ‘marriage’ is overwhelming and weighs down daughters in ways more than one. This generates a vibe to lighten the burden off her parents’ shoulder. By being self-sufficient to never fall back to them in unfavourable conditions. Even the divorce process seems highly expensive if it ever comes to that. All of the factors inculcates a natural reluctance for marriage.

The increased average age of marriage indicates that women now refuse to succumb to their parental/societal pressure. They are aiming for higher grounds of achievements; financial independence rather than dependence on father or husband or their son. Social awareness and women empowerment are the leading factors for women to delay their marriage until they find a “suitable” partner.

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